In high school, my friend Ricardo fell in love with his classmate Manuela. I followed him as he found the courage to speak out about his feelings despite his fears. They started dating, traveling together and meeting family. And for him, it was the love of his life. Until it’s over. Ricardo’s world fell apart. He said he couldn’t find anyone like her, and it hurt his heart…an agony worthy of a Mexican soap opera. For our peace of mind, Ricardo got married last year. Not like Manuela.
- Joaquín Ferreira dos Santos: One oversight and I was at the crime scene.
- Jose Eduardo Aguarusa: african mamdani
Years later, I discovered another story. When Lucas was almost 30 years old, he fell in love with Roberto. It was a feeling he had not allowed himself to experience until that moment. This was new and surprised him. For the first time, Lucas realized that he could not control his emotions. With tears in his eyes, he told the analyst that he wanted to return to his old self and control his emotions. The passion was too painful. It was a dramatic statement, but it was something Lucas could only say in the moment, as he was experiencing something unprecedented. What he didn’t know yet was that he would begin a race against time to make up for the time he had never experienced before. An experience stolen by a society that insists there is an age limit to who you are.
Lucas’ story is mine…and many others.
I grew up fine-tuning my personality, the way I acted, and my interests. And along with them, I also lost the experience of a normal youth. I confess that I tried to recreate what was happening around me, watching my colleagues live their first passions. However, the problem is that no matter how much desire increases hope, emotions cannot be imitated.
27 years were taken away from me.
- Julio Maria: The first generation who doesn’t know Pele
I was happy with the woman, but not completely. Perhaps that’s why the passionate depictions in the book seemed exaggerated to me. Can an initial passion change a person’s life that much? I found out late that it was.
When you accept yourself and allow yourself to live to your fullest, you realize how much you have been unjustly taken from and that those responsible will never give you back what you were not able to live. Right now, I feel there is a disconnect between what is expected of me at my age and what I want to experience. This race to regain what has been lost creates anxiety, anguish, and the question, “When will enough be enough?” When will you know that you have lived the life you were meant to live, like Ricardo? This feeling of being unused haunts the lives of people in the LGBT+ community.
At least it’s reassuring to know that a new generation can find references to things I thought didn’t exist in Pedro the Teenage. Growing up believing that you are the only one suffering creates hopelessness and hopelessness. Even if these new young people face obstacles because of who they are, at least they will know that their experience is not unique or alone.
Meanwhile, we, people of my generation and those before me, keep telling ourselves that there’s no need to rush, that the loss of what was taken from us doesn’t hurt so much.
About The Author
